Recipe for Bootstrap Soup
Ingredients:
One Idiot President
One Illegal War
Eight YEARS of Blunders
add inflation, to taste.
Cooking Instructions:
Boil the fuck out of it.
Serving instructions:
Throw it all in the garbage.
Starve in the Dark
Suckers
On second thought,....Does anybody feel like a CHANGE
from the same old
Bootstrap Soup?
Vote Pizza
Freshly Baked Cookies Smell by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
Freshly Baked Cookies Smell
One of the judges on American Idol, Paula Abdul is notorious for soft peddaling, when it comes to the contestants.
She tries to stay positive, in spite of a bad performance. She compliments hair clothes and dance, if the singing is lacklustre.
So here is my interpretation of the American Idol Judges.
Randy : Dog, it was just aiight with me, you were a little pitchy.
Paula : You are GREAT, I love those shoes,
and you look STUNNING in that suit.
Your farts smell like fresh baked cookies.
Marry me.
Simon : I have to disagree with Polar and Randy,
I thought it was oooful, and I caun't smell cookies.
I am going to CHANGE my name by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
I am going to CHANGE my name
I have decided to change my name.
Hello, my name is Hitler Bush...I KNOW, I HATE my NAME.
I suppose it could be worse, I could be named GEORGE Bush.
Anyway I have started the procedures to change my name.
From now on NO MORE JOKES about my name.
NO I will no longer be Hitler Bush.
From now on I am going to be known under a MUCH more appealing name.
Please
Call me
Hitler Obama
Kidding my name isn't Hitler Obama,
Have a nice day Old joke lovers.
Sincerely ERNIE(was JOHN)Shithouse
John Lennon and Hitler. by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
John Lennon and Hitler.
John Lennon once said " We are bigger than Hitler"
or "Jesus" or something.
John Lennon never immitated Hitler...well actually he did, but he never said anything racist...uh, he did that too.
He sung "Imagine theres no Hitler" or something.
He eventually became less racist as he grew up.
All we are saying is,
Lennon would never have worn a Hitler moustache toupee.
He had glasses
and hair,
and shoes.
He was great.
"I am the Eggplant" he would often sing, or whatever.
I know some asshole shot him, like,
and he was all,
like, dead and stuff,
or whatever.
He was married to Yoko Bono, or somebody.
I think she broke up the Beag
The Funny thing about RACISM by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
The Funny thing about RACISM
The funny thing about Racism is, that everybody has Prejudice, to one degree or another.
I wrote in a short story, that John Lennon became LESS Racist, as he grew up. (link in artists comments below)
My choice of words is deliberate.
I wanted to convey the notion that he was a human, who struggled with his own Racist tendencies, as part of the process of becoming a mature adult.
That Racism is Human Nature.
Suspicion of the Unknown is a defence mechanism.
Knowledge makes the Unknown known.
Did you know that statistics show, the more racist tendencies, the lower the intelligence?
Xenophilia is a great word, but it isn't used as much as
Im NOT a Rabid Patriot but 911 by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
Im NOT a Rabid Patriot but 911
I'm not a Rabid Patriot, although I am happy I live in Canada.
We are ALL on the SAME PLANET.
The reason I bring this up is, I received an email about someone singing the Canadian National Anthem, in Hindi......Hindi is the language, Hindu is the faith, and people.
The Rant was claiming that Canada was somehow in DANGER, because someone chose to sing our anthem in a language other than English or French.
Really,...is that the BIGGEST threat to ANYTHING?
Which brings me to my 9-11 story.
On that awful day we watched in horror.
The TV was playing it over and over, I was in SHOCK.
Terrible.
Across the hall from my apartment, there lived
Brad and Angelina Spoonerist? by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
Brad and Angelina Spoonerist?
Are Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie Spoonerists? A spoonerism is a phrase where the words are changed by switching the start of words. Invented by the Reverend Spooner, or Speverend Rooner.He would wange his chords by switching the wart of stords. Having said that, Brad Pitt & Angelina named their child Shiloh Pitt. The Spoonerism? Pile o Shit.
To be continued, link in Artists Comments :D
Brangelina SpoonerismTwinPitts by KeswickPinhead, literature
Literature
Brangelina SpoonerismTwinPitts
Continued from Link in Artists Comments
Are Brad Pitt & Angelina Jolie Spoonerists?
Yes,Shiloh Pitt has a twin brother Shieceov. Shieceov Pitt and Shiloh Pitt are not entirely identical twin Pitts.
The pin twits, Piece of Shitt, and Pile o Shitt, are enrolled at Schifferent Dools.
They are never at the lame socation.
In the future, the twins will grow,one Pitt will grow more than the other.
Shieceov Pitt will become the paller of the Tits, while Shiloh Pitt will become the porter of the Shits.
They will no ider be longdentical twins.
People will continue to pease the Titts, but for the post mart,
Piece of Shit & Pile o Shit li